He wants to know if I will fall asleep with him
and I tell him again
that I will if he is quiet
but he asks again
just tell me, mama, will you
and it would be easy to say yes
but it has been an hour
and I am now a dangerous mix
of tired and angry
I try to think of something I am grateful for
but everything seems far away
those remnants of a kinder me
and this child I know I love
but who is now the enemy
my adulthood has slipped off me like a coat
and I am now a child like him
refusing to move
buried in my fury
knowing it will feel bad later
but reveling for now
in the roar.