All I know about her
is what I’ve read in the news
the abyss of her grief
I’ve heard people say
my heart aches for you
but I didn’t realize they meant it
is her agony so big
it needs other mothers to carry it
or is it my own panic
at the quicksand of imagination
I can barely get the words out
when my husband asks me
why I am crying on the couch
I could not survive it.