They have been quiet
in their bedroom for ages
so I finally pull out my novel
tentatively
I am in the middle
of the first page
when they thunder out
she is in a dress
and a yellow raincoat
he is wearing
his dad’s swim trunks
and a tweed hat
they tell me I can keep reading
because I am the teacher
she is a girl named Rosie
and he is Rosie’s dad
they’re pretending
it’s Rosie’s first day of preschool
which is actually coming up
for my daughter in a few weeks
my son says
pretending to be her dad
you’ll cry so so much
but then you’ll forget
you have a mom and a dad
and then they pick you up
I am about to interject
but she seems satisfied
with this explanation
and he is already
pretending to help her
put her jacket away
in our cutlery drawer
which he says is her cubby
I don’t get any more reading in
because he tells me
I should give Rosie
a snack
I don’t mind
because I’m lost
in how sweet it is
that he is roleplaying
this milestone in her life
before it happens
and I think about how
my therapist friends
in particular
will be impressed
which is when
I hear the loud coughing
and a thump
from the bedroom
my daughter and I run in
and we find my son on the floor
are you ok
I yell
and he opens one eye
and whispers
you have to tell Rosie
I drank poison by accident
and now I’m dead
so she has to stay
at the preschool forever
my daughter takes my hand
and walks me back
into the kitchen
can we have cereal for snack
Mrs. Sam
she asks me
and I don’t know
what else
to say
but yes.