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2012-08-06T12:29:00-07:00August 6th, 2012|Parenthood|

Not far from shore

We swam out to a log
your life jacket riding up by your ears
your legs kicking kicking kicking
your smile blue and thrilled

I could tell by how you kept squealing
that noise a child’s heart makes
when it’s mad with joy
that you couldn’t read my thoughts
though I wonder what my face looked like
in that string of moments
too slow for panic
perhaps I looked confused
or peaceful

there we were
not far from shore
but deep enough
a friend beside us
cheering us on
your first big swim
and my legs were kicking too
kicking kicking kicking
but without my arms
I didn’t know
I was so heavy

I held you up
barely
my heart slamming
my chin craned for sky
and had that friend not been there
had her legs not been strong enough
to take you
I know what every mother knows

and this is the peaceful part

I would swallow the sea
before letting
you go.

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