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2016-01-05T06:00:01-08:00January 5th, 2016|Parenthood|

Falling asleep with my kids

It’s the same every time
I wake up
in my clothes
disoriented
like I’ve been drugged
and left in this small bed

I lay in the dark for a while
feeling hungover
trying to remember
what I have due tomorrow
what window of work I have wasted

I walk to the bathroom
like an old person
I brush my teeth slowly
stopping to yawn

I pass my husband in the hallway
I put my hand up
and I shake my head
the moment is silent
but he knows what it means

I lost

I remember the part
when I was hanging on
but the undertow of fatigue
got me again

I lie down in my own bed
curled up
like an abandoned thing

I fall back asleep
and dream I am flying
free and high and light.

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