This daily trip to the edge
I can’t help it
the triggers are everywhere
an ambulance moaning by
a missed phone call
a sock of his
slumped over a chair
first I picture how it would happen
the details ambush my mind
painting it all
before I can stop it
on the inside
of my eyes
and then I imagine the after
the chewed up hull
of my being
the service
and the things I would try
to say
the hate I would aim
at the things
that still exist
like his quiet chair
his chipped mug
I park the car
and I can see him inside
talking on the phone
pacing and eating whatever
he can spoon from the fridge
there has been no fire
no heart attack
just a phone call
he couldn’t get off
perhaps his agent
or his dad
there is no cure
for this daily trip
to the edge
only my hand
on his warm
perfect face.



6 comments / Add Yours
Correction: not yo , but To
ReplyJM
Jan 17, 2013
Yo love deeply is to suffer deeply–even if the scenarios are merely fiction. The worst tragedy would be to forget to laugh at our mind’s antics.
ReplyJM
Jan 17, 2013
I have to say, the comment above me is just as sweet as this poem. You two are adorable.
ReplyIt is scary to think of the worst that can happen. It’s been to live in the love.
karin
Jan 17, 2013
First of all, I love you more than anything, and thus will never leave, and in fact never really leave, because I’m always thinking about you and that little Eggy, meaning you’re a a part of me. Obviously. Second, spoon anything? I’d never spoon ketchup, for instance—although it’s spoonable. I’m a pecan butter-raspberry jam man, as a rule. So that’s two things that must be forever banished from the worry pile. Three, I love you more than anything. And four, I love you more than anything, And five, see one three and four, and also two because I’m feeling peckish. I love you.
Thadeus Crumplebum III
Replyat your service
pete
Jan 17, 2013
your words describe so beautifull what happens so often to me as well. thank you so very much. I do hope you can have days in which you don’t take this trip xo
Replymarina_sorr
Jan 17, 2013
Thank you for capturing this daily journey and wrestling it to paper. So beautiful, each word so perfect.
I have reconciled myself to this daily journey my mind insists upon with the understanding that this is perhaps the price of sharing in so deep a love. A small price, indeed, for such a blessing.
ReplyKaren
Jan 16, 2013